Monday, March 8, 2010

Weekend stuff....

Assalaam alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatahu

Good Morning everyone !

Well, my weekend... it was a strange one. part of it was the worst time I have ever had in my life , but yet the sun was shining and was full of smiles and giggles.

It's hard to know , sometimes, if the choices we make are the right ones. For example, we say...nothing is worth having if it was easy to get. Or...there is the thought that if Allah wills it, then it should be easy and good. Is something bad happening to us because we have to learn more patience and sabr? Or is it to force us to let go ? Things have a way of repeating themselves until we get it right...don't u find? I do believe that everything happens for a reason, whether good or bad..

I do know one thing... when things are tough, it's a blow to our faith. Even though there is this saying that when the world brings you to your knees, you're in the perfect position to pray. But it's hard cause you had put faith and hopes in God's hands and it brought you pain. So why or how can you trust and submit again when you feel that it's probably just gonna get you hurt again? I have to admit , though, When things have been very difficult in the past, I prayed and asked God to help me and when I did. things immediately got better. It at least get's it off your shoulders and into God's hands.

When things are good... sometimes we put praying and trusting in God in the back of our minds. Course we are not supposed to.

On a sister's ( not my real sister.. sister in Islam ) blog I read today... that she had a hard time and was weak in faith and no one was there for her. I felt horrible. Why you ask? because I had noticed her withdrawal and a few times I had a feeling that she was headed down the wrong path. I didn't reach out to her. I thought that maybe It wasn't my place , us not being super close best friend's.. just pretty much acquaintances and share a few friends together. I pray she accepts my apology and finds it in her hear to forgive me, Incha'Allah. We really have to support each other in our deen. I have been blessed to be surrounded with sisters that help me. Al hamdulilah. but this came over time. It wasn't so in the beginning.
So please.. if you feel a sister is fading into the background or mentions some depressing things..or just needs a little lift.. take the time to reach out. Surround yourselves with good sisters that will do his for you as well. Cause one day you might be the one in need. ;)

Anyway enough of this thinking stuff !!

My baby girl is just such a joy to me and brings sunshine in my life. She is a very special baby for sure. Even when she is bad and has a temper...she is so darn cute !! Al hamdullilah for her :) ( and of course the other two...goes without saying..cause they have been my reason to live :))

My brother came to visit yesterday. It's almost a year since we moved apart. I miss him dearly. So we did some computer stuff and he spent some time with the kids and enjoyed the baby and her extreme naughtiness. hehe. Hated to see him leave though. I love my baby brother ! We had spaghetti and Salad...anyway he seems to enjoy himself too.

Also.. I got my hair cut and styled!! you might say.. why the heck does she even bother.. she wears a scarf over it lol Well those of you that knew me as a non-hijabi know that my best feature is my hair...and I have really let go...don't even brush it most days. it was almost down to my behind and all broken and dry..and tangled. I used to get my hair done every couple months...I had the softest...shiniest hair...and bouncy! but it had become literally a mop. My hair could be found much of it was falling out. I only wore it in a ponytail at home...when I once would even do my hair on weekends... I stopped this. Mostly cause I hated my hair. Maybe part of it was my depression. Well.... I can tell you... I went to a hair salon. A REAL one..not stupid Walmart where I have gone the past few times I got it trimmed like a year ago !! lol
( BTW sisters.. don't worry hubby gave me the ok ;), those who are not Muslim...a woman should not cut her hair without the husbands permission. It's an intimate part of their relationship that most men enjoy. It's not required that man have his wife's permission, however, he is supposed to be a pious man and love his wife and care about what pleases her and a good Muslim man will do whatever it takes and it's understood that he isn't required to do what she says BUT that he is a man that should know better and do so to benefit the marriage )
So ya...I got it washed..not thinking much about it.. I figured it would be just a quick get it over with kinda wash..cause truly the price they charge is a normal one and I did not expect more. But...sisters.. the hairdresser gave a scalp massage..oh MAN did it feel good!! al hamdullilah it was kinda funny cause the towel she used to put on my wet hair to go over to the hairdressing keep me hidden , was not big enough !! my hair was too long for her towel! lol so then she proceeded in brushing and combing my hair in this very very relaxing way..if I was a cat, I would have purred ! I told her how I wanted it cut..and she clipped away...I was pretty impressed with her way of cutting... I haven't seen anything like that since I went to a fancy place in Canterbury , Kent, UK. where I spent a buncha cash to treat myself. so then she dried it with a hair dryer and the warm wind it made over and in my hair felt like heaven ....then VOILA... my bouncy, shiny long beautiful hair was back !! I felt like myself again! Where the heck have I been and why didn't I do this before?!! DUHHHHHH

So that's my lesson...when I am starting to feel down..go out and spend and spend 20, well spent, bucks and get my hair done!

Salams y'all I gotta go hang up some washing on this beautiful +2 Celsius weather then go shopping for my lil baby :)


Michele/Ama said...

Anyhow.. as ur friend who loves you....and as a muslim who tries to do the right thing...i will not say things that are negative against your husband and marriage..but know I know u deserve better and what is Islamicly proper..but Im here for emotional support, an ear and stand behind u no matter what you do. Unless it is unislamic..then I kick your behind;)

Im glad your feeling great and the way you discribe it..I wanna get my hair done too:( ..
Love you Karen you deserve the happiness...and $20 is a cheap price topay for it.

Candice said...

I know what you mean in this post but I don't know what to say about it! But it's definitely so important to keep in touch with other Muslimahs or at least people who help bring you up. It's all good to say that God will always be there, and He will, but when it's hard to even find the effort to make the connection, a person doesn't get the benefits so help is needed! It's so great that you can find it in you to think about being there for others when you yourself are going through some things. masha'Allah!

About your hair, that's awesome! You need some things for YOU :)
Mentioning that we should ask our husbands makes me think about when I first cut my hair short last year... I did it out of being mad in life (from my husband I guess) and just cut it! From being really long to even shorter than what you see on Facebook! Glad he got over it quickly, but he likes long hair and would not have said yes to this haircut! Glad you consulted your's at least!

Anonymous said...

Assalamu alaikom,
The way you describe it, I want to go there and have her give me a scalp massage and good haircut, too. Sounds sooooooooooooo nice. $20 is cheap for some relaxation and nice hair, I'm glad you found this hairdresser. :)

Take care, dear.

You said,
"It's hard to know , sometimes, if the choices we make are the right ones."

I think this very thought often.

Fatima said...

I totally agree with you!! Sometimes, when things are really rock bottom and everything is at its worst, you just need someone there to trust in you, so thank you for the reminder!!!
and it was fun to read about your experience! There aren't many hijab friendly hair salons around where I live so most of my hair cutting goes on at home but I am glad anyway that you had a good time! And I didn't know that a woman has to ask her husband before cutting her hair, so that's something new that I've learnt today also!
Thank you XXXX

Anonymous said...

Salaam Sis

I love you... and yes gurl getting the scalp massage is AWESOME.... I fall asleep when I get my hair done... I wish I could see the hair cut but its cool... I never get why people think just because we're muslim woman we don't need to get our hair done... Hmmm
I say do it gurl and flip it out... LOL
HUG Love you mucho for the sake of Allah

Twizzle said...

as-salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah,

I think this is my first comment on your blog...

inshallah sister, inshallah you will always have support to turn to when you are feeling down and are able to be there for others when they are feeling down.

We do not always know what to do or say to make someone feel better, but we can let them know that we are there if they need to talk.

Alhamdulillah for your children and that was really nice you got to visit with your brother :)

I so know what you mean about abandoning your hair after starting to wear hijab... my poor hair has been so neglected. I could use a nice scalp massage right about now :) there is no better feeling than getting your hair washed, cut and dried at the salon. :)